Flying over the Middle East I attempt to sleep however I can’t because my head is thinking about what I want to write to summarise my 7 week journey.
When I first took this plane ride out I was running away. I was running away from problems that I felt the only way to deal with was to have some time on my own completely cut off from everyone. I need space to reflect on my life, my relationships with people and hoped to find inspiration for what I want to do with my life. It’s a lot of pressure to put into a 7 week trip but I feel a better person for doing it.
As I’ve said in previous blogs, I was meant to take this journey at this point in my life. I felt dangerously close to being completely consumed by my depression. Now I’m flying back home so of course I do feel sad to be leaving the two most beautiful and amazing countries I’ve been to but I feel excited to make the changes that I need to in order to have a happier and healthy life.
I’ve been asked a few times now where was my favourite place, they are not so much places but moments.
Being picked up from my cousins at the airport was a massive one for me, getting off a 30 hour flight and being embraced by family the other side of the world is a warm feeling I will never forget and will always be thankful for.
Climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The climb is split into sections so you can have pictures done. There is one moment that you have truly to yourself, it’s about 100 metres where you get to do a solo climb. I remember walking up, looking down on the harbour at sunset and welling up. It was a proud moment for me that I had achieved one of the things I had wanted to do for so long.
Hiking in The Blue Mountains, views I will never forget. The accomplishment of walking among such beautiful nature was incredible.
Byron Bay. What a place, a place that I felt I had a deep connection with. A place where I felt cleansed of all the bad things that have happened, a sense of release from hurt and a place of forgiveness. I had felt so angry at a lot of people, held grudges and most of all felt angry with myself. I felt peace from all that here.
Meeting my Dad off the plane in Sydney and being able to share New Zealand with him was amazing. It’s one thing to experience to beauties of our world but it’s another thing to share it with someone you love.
Ben Howard’s song Keep Your Head Up has a lovely line in it which feel right for how I’m feeling..
I saw a friend of mine the other day, he told me that my eyes were gleaming,
I said I’ve been away and he knew, he knew the depths I was meaning.
Friends have said they haven’t seen me be me since we were younger, the truth is I’m not that person anymore. The person who goes out clubbing, is bullet proof the relationships and hyperactive. I’m a better version of that person, I’m ready to restart. Achieve goals, inspire and feel free of pain.
I’m also ready for a cuddle with my Mum 🙂
So I shall leave you with that. Day 54 of my journey, 4 hours until touch down.
Signing off for now,